12 Lessons I Learned In 2020

You Can Run, But How Long Can You Hide?

For a long time, I tried to hide from myself and my true desires, so I went along with what I thought I was supposed to do. I did whatever felt less scary. Earlier in the year, I almost signed on a dotted line to do something I absolutely did not want to do. I thought I had no choice, I thought it was the best decision; I thought I had to suffer to find my way through.

Family Is A Necessity

I guess I already knew this about family. But in 2020 I learned more and more that they aren’t just here to be here — they are here for a reason. To be a shoulder to cry on. To remember past experiences. To love more. To laugh more. To dance. To experience. To be surrounded when you’d rather be alone. To feel good energy from. To understand that the world is vast and the people around you make you who you are and who you’ve always been.

It’s Ok To Trust People

This has been the hardest lesson of my life. Since I can remember it’s been hard for me to trust people and this year, it’s been nice to let go a little bit and just trust that they love me. Trust they’re trying their best and trust they want to be around me genuinely.

Dreams Come In Their Own Time

We’ve heard it several times from famous and successful people; timing is everything and your dreams come in time. While it’s widely known, it isn’t always easy to accept. I’ve written my dreams down for years. Halfway through the year, I completely forget all of them and start chasing new ones and then it feels forced so I stop and feel sorry for myself.

It’s Perfectly Fine To Honor Both Sides

I am an extremely complex human being. I guess God made me like this but it hasn’t always been easy to accept all the oxymoron's. In 2020, I decided to accept my complexity as a blessing and not something that needs to be fixed.

New Friends Are Cool, Old Friends Are Great

My friendships have strengthened this year. So much change. I’ve grown closer to some and farther away from others. And I love them both equally.

I Am Afraid Of What People Think

If I’m going to be honest about my lessons, I should be all the way honest. This isn’t a lesson I am proud of but it is a very real, and human lesson. I was hoping that I would be over this by the end of 2020, but I am slowly working my way out of it. I’d say I’m about 80% of the way there.

I am the Mom Now.

My daughter lost several teeth in 2020. It’s like even her baby teeth were trying to get the fuck out of 2020. One night, my husband and I were sitting on the couch and she ran into the room frantic and crying.

Honor Your Truth

I was sitting in my little room (more on that later) one morning writing my morning pages when I slipped into a daydream of me writing a column.

It’s Ok To Like White Women

This is a weird lesson, but I’m weird so it’s on brand.

Saying No Is Necessary

An extension of the people pleasing thing. I learned this year that not only can I tell people no, it is necessary for me to do so. I have to tell people no sometimes to fulfill the vision of my life. It just is what it is and it’s a beautiful lesson to learn. I am not mean when I say no or crazy or any other negative attribute I’ve attached to the word no. I’m just living my life the most authentically I can and if no is appropriate, no it is.

Life Is Whatever You Decide

What a generic 12th lesson of 2020 but a very very true one for me. Life is not really about circumstance or any of the other shit. It will be whatever you choose for it to be. I’ve learned that getting up everyday around 5/5:30am to write and meditate is one of the only things that keeps me sane.

Multi medium storyteller | Author | Poet | Curator | somewhere between Lauryn Hill, Nola Darling, & Jesus Christ

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